The Death Penalty Deters ME

February 15th, 2007

I know with 100% certainty that the death penalty does work as a deterrent against murder. I know this because I’m not in jail yet.

I’m serious. Give me immunity from prison and access to a machine gun and watch in amazement as I decrease the American population by 70% in six months. It doesn’t take much to set me off, either.

Big fan of reality television? Say goodnight.

Own a pair of pants with a word written on the butt? Sayonara.

Ever attempt to order a sub sandwich and talk on your cell phone at the same time? Maybe I’ll ask Jimmy Buffett to write a song about you.

The death penalty obviously works because I haven’t killed anyone yet. Does anyone need more proof than that?



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