Ever see a fat working dog? I see them all the time. Beautiful capable German Shepherds, tenacious floppy eared beagles, insanely intelligent border collies all with fat bellies swinging to and fro, chins doubling and tripling up underneath their wrinkled snouts, little legs buried under mounds of fat. Dogs like these were born and bred [...]

Today I stopped by my local Starbucks for a cup of coffee. Before I left the cream and sugar counter to sit by a window, sip my drink and zone out, I absentmindedly grabbed one of the pamphlets to read. It was entitled ‘Starbucks Commitment to Social Responsibility’ and while I didn’t open that pamphlet [...]

Brother’s Girlfriend: I often wonder what I’d do if there was an apocalypse. Then I realize I’d never end up being one of the survivors, so it doesn’t matter.
Brother: Yeah, you’d never survive.
V: I still say dogs would be very useful in the event of a plague, assuming they went unaffected.
Brother: Yeah, [...]

I often write about the mistakes I’ve made. In fact, I would say the majority of this website consists of all the stupid, ridiculous shit that I’ve done over the years. Some of my mistakes are admittedly funny and I know you guys are rooting for me even as I make an ass of [...]

Do school photographers even try to take good pictures?
I highly doubt it. Never in my life have I seen anyone look even reasonably attractive in a school photograph. Instead, it looks as though a slew of unhappy children were herded into the gym like cattle while some neurotic creep with a camera desperately tried to [...]